Graduation Day
Ben closed his eyes and blasted out a tune on his saxophone. He shivered all over. Sex was a distant second to this feeling. Well sex with every girl except for his ex-girlfriend Ellie. But then the girls he was with besides Ellie were mostly one-night stands. He opened his eyes and looked at her picture on his mantel. She was sexier in a long gown wearing big glasses than other girls were half-naked. He remembered how she loved to listen to him play and how mad she was when he gave it up.
As Ben played it occurred to him that if music made everyone feel like he felt drugs would be obsolete. The sad part was that all music would ever be to him was a hobby, one that he was able to indulge in infrequently. Since he was headed for a long overdue entry into the adult world he had to put childish things aside. The only thing standing between him and a career were the results of his final test scores in two courses.
His father???s best friend had promised him a job if he obtained a college degree. While Ben???s father said that his friend required the degree, Ben thought it was his father???s stipulation. His mother claimed that his father had to bribe his friend for the job, but she was always saying things like that.
Ben stopped playing and looked at his watch, then he continued. He hadn???t had this much free time in years and he probably wouldn???t have much in the future. A round of applause jolted him back to reality. He opened his eyes. It was Brett and Bob. ???What? You???re playing that stupid thing again,??? Brett said. He was wearing his usual uniform of pressed dockers, boat shoes, and a dress shirt with a button down collar. ???Nah, I???m just screwing around. You know, killing some time.??? ???Damn, I forgot how much you used to play that thing. I thought you were obsessed with it or something.??? Brett said as he looked at Ben???s ear. ???What are you wearing an earring now too???? Ben fingered the small diamond chip in his ear and said, ???I never stopped wearing it.??? ???Or jeans and tee shirts.??? ???We???re in school, not...??? ???I thought he was nuts,??? Bob said. ???All the guy did was honk on his sax like he didn???t have a care in the world and he was on the verge of flunking out of his fifth school or something like that.??? ???I was just . . .??? ???Back then I never thought we???d be friends, and I sure didn???t think you???d graduate,??? Brett said. ???Yeah, whatever,??? Ben said. ???But he did have soul,??? Bob said as he forced a laugh. Bob wedged himself between Brett and Ben and slapped Ben on his shoulder. Since Bob was about thirty pounds overweight and Ben was thin, Ben was knocked forward. ???And then my friend here did a complete turn around. Now he???s going to graduate and become a productive member of society.??? ???I think he deserves to go out and get drunk with us,??? Brett said. ???We got to do something so he doesn???t get hooked on that phallic symbol again,??? Bob said. ???What the hell does your dick look like???? Ben said. ???Look, maybe I???ll catch up to you guys later.??? ???That???s it, he???s gone,??? Bob said. ???Next he???ll be going with that hippie chick again. What was her name???? Brett tilted his head toward the picture of Ellie and Bob turned red. Ben picked up the sax and started to play. Brett signaled for Bob to follow him as he walked out of the door.
Her name was Ellie, idiot, Ben thought as he stood up and bopped along with the music. And while she might be going down the wrong path she would never mock someone because of their beliefs. He was starting to think that went with being a yuppie. Ben was glad his friends had left. He wasn???t mad at them, but he didn???t even want to talk about celebrating, not until he got his test scores. If he failed he would have to repeat the courses, which meant he???d have to repeat the year, possibly in a new school. As he played he remembered when he met Brett and Bob. He thought they were nerds; they thought he was a freak. He thought they were greedy and shallow yuppies; they thought he was a useless musician. Each thought the other was wasting their lives. But when he started to take business courses he got to know them. He found out they were just people who took life seriously and knew what they had to do to get through it. They weren???t greedy; they were just sensible. Ben saw the light on his answering machine click on. He put down the sax and ran for the phone. Through the announcement he could hear his father???s voice. He grabbed the phone and put it to his ear. ???Dad, Dad, hold on, let me turn off the machine.??? ???Where the hell were you? You have to start being responsible. School might be over. . . .??? Ben turned off the machine and spoke. ???Hey Dad, what???s up???? ???What do you think is up? You???re finally graduating after all this time. I always knew we???d make it.??? ???Is that why you always called me Uncle Eugene???? ???No, I called you Uncle Eugene because you insisted playing that annoying instrument and taking those fool subjects that won???t do you a bit of good. For a while there I thought you were going to end up a real cream puff.??? ???Dad, I. . . .??? ???But you pulled through my boy, just like I thought you would. You don???t even bother with those loser friends anymore.??? ???Hey, they were good people. They just weren???t into the rat race, that???s all.??? ???They were headed nowhere fast with you in tow. But that???s in the past. I???m calling to get the details of your graduation. A lot of your relatives want to be there.??? Ben felt the sweat from under his arm run down his side. He hadn???t told his father that he was having trouble in school. Those days were supposed to be over, this was the new Ben. The problem was that while he studied he was still taking a double major in hard courses that he had little interest in. And while he had given up the sax and quit his band, he held onto his electives. In fact, he almost had a minor in English. If he was going to go to college he was at least going to learn some things that he was interested in. Besides, in his majors he was lost, in the classes he liked he felt like he belonged. ???Uh, Dad, that???s all still up in the air.??? ???How could graduation be up in the air? You complete the requirements, they have a ceremony, I hook you up with a job, and you make lots of money. What???s the big mystery???? ???No, I mean there???s something, uh, they still don???t know what hall they???re going to have it in so they don???t know how many people we can invite. They never tell us anything.??? ???Well when you???re in the real world you???re going to find that conduct unacceptable, and I???m talking about the conduct on your part. You have to be aware of what???s going on at all times.??? ???Yes sir.??? ???Well find out what you can and get back to me. And Ben???? ???Yes sir.??? ???I???m proud of you. This was money well spent.???After Ben hung up the phone he thought about his Uncle Eugene and shook his head. His Uncle had graduated from Harvard and then spent his life writing books that were far from best sellers. His father said that he died broke. Ben was told that he was going to end up like him so often that his nickname became Uncle Eugene.
Ben didn???t like what his father said about his old friends. He still liked them; they just didn???t have anything in common anymore. For a time he had to stay away from them, like an alcoholic who had to stay out of bars if he wanted to stop drinking. He quit his band and avoided them so he wouldn???t be sucked back in. Some of his ex-bandmates resented it, but he had to think of his future, they sure weren???t. As time went by he began to see them for what they were; likable flakes.
It was around this time that he broke up with Ellie. They still got along, and they liked each other, but Ben was becoming a different person. When they met Ben was a musician and Ellie was a painter. Now Ellie was a painter and Ben was a yuppie in training. While he never derided Eillie???s work, it hurt him to see her wasting her time.
Ben wasn???t surprised when Ellie wanted to leave him. What did surprise Ben was his inability to find a new girlfriend. He didn???t have trouble attracting girls in the business school. They were impressed by who his father was and he wasn???t bad looking. The problem was that while they had the same major he didn???t want to talk about business if he didn???t have to. And the girls found his talk about music and playing in clubs and what book he was reading boring.
Ben put the sax away and got out a summer school schedule. He looked for courses that he could take if he failed the tests. He smiled, exhaled, and circled a senior computer course. Then as he flipped the pages futilely for a senior business course his heart started to pound. His pencil slipped out of his hand. He wiped the sweat off of his palms and picked it up. He got out a college guide to find nearby colleges that he might be able to attend over the summer.
On the day the test results were released Ben skipped breakfast and headed for the Drill building. He got there before it opened. As he waited he got a call on his cell phone from his friend Tim, who reminded him that he was supposed to help him move. Ben looked at his watch, waited another minute, and then went to help Tim. He told himself that he was obligated to help him and that it would just take a little while, but he hoped that it would take the rest of the day. As they worked he kept looking at his watch. As long as he was helping Tim everything was out of his control, but he knew that he was just postponing the inevitable.
When they were done Ben had eight minutes left before the Drill building closed. He jogged across campus and made it with four minutes to spare. He hoped no one saw him as he approached the test score board with his eyes closed. He stood in front of the board and then he forced himself to open his eyes. He smiled so wide his face hurt. He jumped up and down and yelled. When he calmed down he headed for his room. He was fifty feet from the building when he went back and double-checked his scores. He wrote down the numbers, went to his room, and flopped down on his bed. All his hard work had paid off. He lay on the bed with his hands behind his head and thought about how good his life was going to be.
The next day a package from Ellie arrived. That was just like her, he thought. Even though she didn???t approve of his new way of life she sent him a graduation present. He tore the paper off and opened the box. It was a book by an author he loved and respected and an envelope. When he picked up the envelope he could smell her perfume. His hand shook He wished that she was with him. He put down the envelope and went out to celebrate with his friends.
When Ben woke up the next morning he was surprised that he didn???t have a hangover. As he ate his scrambled eggs he opened the letter Ellie had sent him. She congratulated him and told him to read the foreword in the book she had sent. In the foreword the author thanked Ben???s Uncle Eugene for inspiring him. He said that if it weren???t for Ben???s Uncle he would never have become a writer.
Ben stopped eating. He took his sax out of the closet, packed a suitcase, wrote down Ellie???s address, and left everything else. He???d call his father when he got established.
continued
8 Feb 2006
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